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Decision-Making: A Rich, Emotional Tapestry

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Here we are at the tail-end of January and it seems like the perfect time to check in with you. January is traditionally a month of ‘new-ness’ and changes. We make resolutions and plant seeds for growth. So, my loves, what I’m wondering is, how’s that all going for you? So many of us pine for a fresh start and know we need to make changes, but don’t know where to begin. We may have trouble deciding what to tackle first and how to sort of re-pattern our lives so to speak. Where’s that clarity when you need it?!?

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Well, recently I sent a survey to some clients asking what their greatest challenge was regarding decision-making. WOW! I was gifted with such honest and insightful feedback that really got me thinking about how much angst and emotional turmoil is involved with this subject  — ‘tis a rich tapestry, indeed!

Believe me, when I say, I really get where you’re at! I truly understand how it feels to struggle with a decision because you’re able to see all the angles, and see a myriad of possibilities before you…how to pick the “right” one? And how can you stay true to your decision if someone else decides to chime in with their reservations or expectations. Or even more anxiety provoking is the idea that your decision or process of decision-making might upset others or be subjected to judgment and scrutiny. GAH! I know, it’s enough to send you running. And let’s not even broach the subject of ‘follow-through’…

You might be asking yourself, “what’s wrong with me? So-and-so just does whatever they feel like, and damn the consequences.” “ I wish I could be more like {fill-in-the-blank}  – they seem to  make up their minds so easily and quickly and stick to their guns no matter what anyone says to them.” “Why am I so wishy-washy?” “It’s just that I can really see the value of all these considerations!!”

Well, you know what? I’m here to tell you that there’s nothing wrong with valuing  different points of view, and there’s absolutely nothing wrong about needing to take your time to feel your way into a decision, or changing your mind on a dime,  AND there’s nothing wrong with making strong, spontaneous decisions. There is no absolute, single, correct way to make choices – what matters most is doing what’s right for you.  Period.  And that means honoring your own process. You have your own way of navigating the world that’s unique and brilliant and special. And I know –I know — I can feel some of you protesting right now because, well, easier said than done, right? It can be a very uncomfortable process that leaves you feeling bunged and frustrated. I hear you. There’s a lot of mixed emotions wrapped up in this, I know.

Some of us may feel responsible for others’ expectations; we don’t want to let anybody down or disappoint anyone. You may be someone who feels others’ emotional energy and the idea of upsetting anyone or creating any kind of emotional wave is just unbearable – you want to crawl under a rock. Some of you might be questioning your judgment because you’ve made some “bad” decisions in the past that you think were either “too hasty” or “too emotional” and you’re afraid of repeating the same “mistake”, and being stuck with the consequences with no chance for doing it over again the “right” way. *sigh* It’s just exhausting isn’t it.

It doesn’t have to be this way.

Did you know that we are not all ‘wired’ to approach decision making in the same way?

Did you know that some of us are simply designed to be more open-minded and easily influenced by others’ thoughts, opinions, and expectations? And there are others who know what they know and aren’t swayed or bothered by outside influences and may be more rigid in their beliefs.

Some of you need to be able to experiment and explore different options – giving yourself permission to make “mistakes” along the way, because that’s how you learn what is and isn’t correct for you. And that’s okay – truly!

This does not make you “less than” or “deficient” in any way. And I understand the trap of comparing yourself to someone else and wanting an easier time of it, an easier process. I can’t stop you from wanting what’s on the other side of the fence where the grass seems greener. What I can help you with is showing you how you’re wired to navigate the world in a way that allows you to grow to love and honor yourself, warts and all, as they say. 🙂  No apologies. It is possible, I promise you.

Sound good? Interested in a consultation?  Well then, I invite you to reach out to me. The consultation is free. It’s my gift to you.

Sending you lots of love and blessings!
Madeleine